Fears and Fantasies

I have a love-hate relationship with the library.
I love libraries to death. I absolutely love walking in and thinking about all the stories that are waiting to open by my fingertips and suck me in. I love the smell of new books. The crackling of spines as I discover books no one else has in a while.
The problem is, I'm not alone.
Many of you will find this hard to believe since I'm such a hyper maniac around my friends, but I am painfully shy around people I don't know. Painfully shy.
The problem is, with the library, is it's a public place.
Rut roh. Danger, Danger Will Robinson!
And so, for the longest while, I have stayed in the children's section. I'm the oldest one there, and so it's not as hard for me. But today, I realized I have read just about everything there worth reading.
And so, I did the impossible. I ventured into the teen's section.
There were about seven people in there. I almost turned around and walked out. But I told myself I had as much right to be there as they did. So I kept walking. I didn't start at "A" because it was right next to the computers where five of the seven people were located.
No thanks.
I went into the middle of the alphabet and balanced the three books I already had on my hip while I browsed the books while trying to look like I belonged.
A lady and her two sons walked into the row I was in, and trust me, the row was not big enough to accommodate four people. So, I walked out and into the next row. Of course there were two teenage girls on that row... awesome.
So I walked back out and just sort of waited. The lady and her sons left, and soon enough so did those girls. I walked back into the rows and just kind of stood there. I crouched down and started flicking through books, glancing at titles. My sixth sense with books took over, and I found some hidden deep in stacks, even some that had been shoved behind some books. My stack grew to about ten books. I straightened, grabbed my stack and my purse and walked out with my head held high.
I overcame my fear.